I know about the betrayal, what next?

Frank Over a year ago I found out my wife cheated on me. We are still married but I still haven’t said anything to her. Should I say anything or just let it go.
Thank you for any advice, love this keep dewing a good job. 
Ramon O, Jr. Oxnard

Ramon, Ask her if she wants to try swinging or polyamory. I don’t know your views on non-monogamy, but if she responds positively to your suggestion, the two of you should seriously look into the possibilities. Obviously her cheating was unfortunate because it involves deception, but you need to distinguish between whatever pain you feel from the deception, and whatever feelings you might have about non-monogamy. You can’t change the past, but you can set sail for a more promising future if you establish a new commitment together. This new commitment is not the traditional “forsaking all others” that you find in conventional marriage ceremonies, but a commitment of partnership through the adventures yet to come. At some point you should probably tell her that you know about her previous cheating, but you should do this at a time when you are feeling like you love her – NOT at a time when you are feeling bitter or resentful. 

On the other hand, if you bring up the possibility of non-monogamy and she says “no way” or gets angry at you for even thinking about it, then you might want to GENTLY tell her that you know about her cheating, and that you forgive her and still love her. Once she sees this reaction, her insecurities about non-monogamy might eventually fade away and then she might be willing to think about it more positively. But don’t expect everything to be resolved all at once. You might have to work on this aspect of your relationship for many months before you both reach a point where you can trust each other enough to let go of the past and start a new.

And finally, I should point out that I am simply offering one suggestion that most people might not consider. The actual wisdom of this suggestion depends on a lot of factor that I don’t know because I don’t know either you or you wife. If you want to talk in more detail about your specific situation, feel free to contact me f.c.investigations@usa.net . I might modify my suggestions based on your actual feelings and the actual situation.

Ramon, If you are a great enough soul to love your wife despite her past mistakes, then you could discover that your most amazing and deeply-loving years are yet to come.

Respectfully,

F.C.Investigations
Frank Crescentini